Hyperfocus: A Curse That I Channeled Into Benefitting Me Like a Blessing

 Hyperfocus: A Curse That I Channeled Into Benefitting Me Like a Blessing.

Have you ever found yourself so absorbed in a task that hours slip by unnoticed, and you’re completely oblivious to everything else going on around you?

The earliest memory I could recall of me doing this was when I was a teenager,  facing my computer screen for 16 hours just playing a game I really liked. I remember not eating or taking any break in its entirety. That's when I realized that my level of immersion wasn’t typical, even for someone passionate about what they’re doing. It struck me that even if you’re deeply in love with an activity, you usually don’t lose yourself in it to such an extent in complete tunnel vision. 

One of the many games that I played non stop for days on end

What I was going through at that time; the uncontrollable burst of hyperfocus, which felt like a relentless curse, often led to missing deadlines and neglecting other responsibilities. I was far behind in my classes and my lack of proper time management skills hampered my sleep schedule which only aggravated the stress that was being piled up against me. My hyperfocusing tendencies alienated me from people my age as they did not have difficulty managing time on particular tasks. Furthermore, my lack of understanding on how you’re supposed to distribute time and energy set me back from reaching  my true potential and caused me to have a negative outlook on my future.

To me, personally, hyper focusing on something wasn't necessarily tied to it only being interesting; it also served the purpose of disconnecting from the outside stimuli that was overbearing for me. But the fear of falling behind compared to my peers definitely outweighed the self fulfillment I got from shutting myself out. Which is why I decided to use my ability to get hooked on a particular thing for a really long time to my advantage. I realized I could spend twice as much time doing something I found interesting than an average person. Eventually I started to use that time to pursue a set of skills that I found intriguing and could really benefit me in the future. 

This flow state helped me to reach a finishing point in one sitting whereas it could have taken people several sessions for multiple days. From tech related skills like learning 3D designing to much more traditional craftsmanship like working with clay, sewing clothes — I was able to learn a variety of things in a less significant amount of time. The self-deprecating monologue that ‘I will never catch up’ was somewhat shut down. I cannot say that it solved all aspects of my problem as I was still struggling to get a lot of  my important work done. But it definitely did help me understand that I wasn’t a lost cause and  I could still make something out of my life. However, in order to tackle the daily inconvenience that was significantly bothering me I had to seek professional help to work my way around it. Either way, I can still say that this definitely helped boost my self-esteem and demonstrated that my unique approach was not only valid but valuable.

The time I got into 3D designing just to invent something that could solve a slight inconvenience I was facing

Two of the many keychains I made for my friends

I want more people to understand that being different from others doesn't automatically mean you’re doing something wrong. Trying to forcefully fit yourself into a mold is gonna do more harm than good. It is okay to navigate your life at your own pace. The world is not going to end soon, and your dreams shouldn't either.

Since I never had the opportunity to ask people my age about this issue, and now I have a much more passive way of asking, did you ever feel the same way? Were you ever abnormally immersed in one task but failed to hold focus on another, much simpler task? Or, was there a time when you struggled so much with hyper-fixating that you became dysfunctional? Did the overbearing guilt of putting off other work caused you to get caught up in a loop? If so, have you ever come across any solution to this problem? Feel free to share any suggestions that come to your mind!